even if the first option is correct, and it's true that people use sex as a way to cope with their problems, it doesn't make cheaters less of a jerk!! use sex with your wife as a way to deal with your problems! deal with it using your hand. like common people. you can't get physically addicted to sex. this guy is a douche.

This is so pathetic. Please feel sorry for me because I'm addicted to sex. Men are such douchebags.

YES skigurl -- fine, sex addiction may be a legitmate problem for people, but why aren't you saying "wife, I have this problem, I love you and want to be satisfied but need your help with this problem"

what an ahole.

You know. I may be a woman but I love sex just as much as a guy. There has been nights I have been unable to get enough to satisfy me. Now, if that is call'n me a jerk then so be it. But remember the saying, to each his own.

There may be some form of truth behind this, but I think in *most* people's cases, the whole "sex addiction makes me cheat" is total BS. I appreciate liars trying to be "good" at it, but it's not good enough. This guys is a loser.

RebelTXAngel - you're not a jerk because you didn't feel satisfied. you're a jerk if you left the house to get it from someone else while you're in a monogamous relationship.

look at it this way: many girls can't orgasm every time or ANY time they have sex...so sometimes that leaves us less satisfied than the guy who pretty much always finishes...but do we cheat then claim we have a problem because we're just not satisfied??

Lets ask our self this... If your boyfriend, fiance, husband or whatever, came to you and said these words... "Baby, I'm a sex addict and I need help. I can't do it myself and all I want is sex." First thing that would go through you head is... "Is he cheating? how does he know he has a sex problem? How many other girls has he been with?" Now, think of it in that perspective then ask yourself why he didn't go to his wife. Why he decided to keep it a secret. Not all cheaters are pricks. Some really do have a heart and can't get over being a sex freak. Now also, the other side of this... If his wife was not giving him any then what is a man to do? I'm sorry but I'm willing to give my man whatever he wants in bed to keep him happy and pleased. If she was not doing that then what is he to do?

RebelTXAngel, neither partner is entitled to as much sex (or anything, really), as they want in a relationship. It's about compromise and communication, and if my husband needed so much more sex than I was willing or able to give him, it's on him to either decide to seek help or end our relationship. Cheating is never the solution.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I'm not saying cheating is right but you can't kill a man by not giving him sex. Just like you can't kill a woman by not giving her any. The adrenaline rush is what keeps most going. I know none of you will see it many way ever but I like to put my ideas and thoughts out there.

"I'm not saying cheating is right but you can't kill a man by not giving him sex. Just like you can't kill a woman by not giving her any. The adrenaline rush is what keeps most going."

Sorry, I don't understand what you're trying to say here.

laaame. i don't think the options in this poll are accurate though, i think you can be someone who uses sex to cope but that doesn't necessarily make you a jerk or an addict. it makes you someone who's found a really crappy way of dealing with your issues!

the term 'addiction' is trying to turn stupid behaviour into something that sounds medical and worse, something that's out of your control. lovely - do something lousy and blame it on some mysterious external force! hellz no.

i don't think the medical community is being all that helpful either, they just want something new to charge people for treatment of something, whether or not it exists. it's win-win, the 'patient'looks like they have some label-able condition ('baby it's not me, i'm sick!') and docs gets cha-ching!

phhhbbllltt!

Didn't expect you would.

thank you torobee!! You put what I was trying to say in your own words.

COP OUT!

RebelTXAngel... I'm with Chouette, I have no clue what you're trying to argue. cheating isn't the answer, it just isn't.

He chose to cheat did he not think he wouldn't have repercussions. He needs to understand he's accountable for his actions and shouldn't scream addiction.

Anywaayyy...

I do think that there is such thing as a sex addiction, but these guys who simply cheat on their wives with interns (or production assistants or whatever) are not such addicts. I've seen a couple of documentaries on people who are addicted to sex, and they do things like spend hours a day masturbating and watching porn and then go out and seek sexual encounters with any willing strangers they find as many times as they can. It's just not on the same level as "needing" to cheat on your spouse because he or she only wants to have sex once or twice a week.

I think it's a little bit of both. I'm sure some men really do get addicted to sex. But I also think that it's definitely not as common as they like us girls to think it is. Either way, cheating is wrong.

But this chick is crazy. She telephoned Mrs. Phillips saying "we can't both have him!" and got ahold of their son on Facebook, pretended to be a classmate and got info on the family. She's got a couple screws loose, not to mention that in the picture I saw of her (or what I think was her, anyway) she was downright scary looking.

I think that sexual addiction is a real thing, especially when someone uses it to make themselves feel better, no matter who it hurts. Like being addicted to drugs, food, etc, you rationalize your behavior so that to you, you arent a jerk, you are just feeding the addiction.

Sex is a powerful thing, that feeling of lust is a chemical driven thing that can turn into a monster if left unchecked by morals and responsibility.

Oh whatever. I'm not sure I believe it at all, but even if I did cheating isn't the way to go about "fixing" the problem. Seriously, grow the hell up and stop making excuses.

Sexual addiction is a very real problem. I think the problem is when people abuse the term as a way to deflect blame. There are plenty of people who battle with this problem to the point where they have lost jobs, loved ones, and their physical health, which makes it all the more appalling when someone who just enjoys cheating uses it to their advantage. You see this in Hollywood in general where a starlet will get caught driving drunk and claim she has a "disease" when in reality she is just a girl who likes to party hard but this time she was caught red handed. It's an insult to all who are actually battling mental health issues. This kind of cowardice is what sets the science of Psychology/ Psychiatry back as a whole.

I agree with #19. I believe sex addiction is real, and I personally know a girl who is a sex addict. I also saw a special on TV about it before. I do think some people use that as an excuse for their actions though, which is wrong.

I think that there are people who are sex addicts, but I also think some people use it as an excuse. I actually know someone who is a sex addict, and she is finally getting the help she needs.

I have a friend who is a sex addict, but he made that clear to his girlfriend before they started dating. In the end it destroyed their relationship because she couldn't handle it (not that I blame her!), but a) he didn't marry her, and b) he never went behind her back. He was always very up-front about what he needed and how he was going to get it. I think it's a very real thing, but it's no excuse for sleeping with young interns or lying to your spouse.

I do believe in an addiction to sex, but I wouldnt go for anyone but my partner were I sex addict.
What I want to know is how they treat it?

Just to let you know your site lookskind of strange in Safari on a mac

agree - cheating isn't the answer
and RebelTXAngel - i'm the first one to say "you have to give your man some lovin in order to keep him happy" - maybe not like 5 times a day if that's what he wants, but you know, a normal amount of sex (like once a day or whatever) in order to keep him satisfied...if a wife withholds sex completely and a man strays, i don't condone the cheating but i do blame the wife for holding out...but that's NOT what this is asking...this is asking if so-called sex-addicts are just jerks and yes, they are if they cheat on their wives and blame it on an addiction

I think it can be an "addiction" but I become skeptical when people only consider themselves addicts once they're caught.

Very true Vanonymous. If the guy thinks therapy will help him, why didn't he go to couples therapy WITH his wife, after the first time he cheated, or maybe even as soon as he realized he had feelings like that?

yes, it's a real medical/psychological condition. Whether mr. phillips is suffering from it is another issue.

Sometimes a cheating a$$hole is just a cheating a$$hole.

I'm not saying he's a sex addict, but sex addiction is real. While one can't be physically addicted, it falls on the obsessive compulsive continuum. You can't be physically addicted to washing your hands or touching a light switch 42 times before leaving the house, but it can consume your thoughts and impair your quality of life. Compulsive masturbation that takes 3 hours of your day is actually quite similar to rituals like touching certain objects in your house that take 3 hours of your day. It ruins your life and impairs one's ability to nurture healthy relationships. He may be a sex addict, or not, but it's really a private matter. If he is, I feel truly bad for him. Obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors can ruin lives.