Funny Christmas Someecards 2012

Christmas Someecards That Spread Sarcastic Holiday Cheer

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Christmas Someecards That Spread Sarcastic Holiday Cheer

In the middle of today's hustle and bustle, give your loved ones a good laugh by sending these hilarious holiday-themed Someecards to your SO and friends. Everyone can use a silly, lighthearted note this Christmas, and it's nice to be a little naughty sometimes. So pick from these playful cards to share some festive, flippant holiday wishes!

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All I want for Christmas is someone to fake an orgasm for.
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All I want for Christmas is someone to fake an orgasm for.

1 / 27
It's the quantity of alcohol not the presence of mistletoe that'll improve your chances of snogging my face of this Christmas.
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It's the quantity of alcohol not the presence of mistletoe that'll improve your chances of snogging my face of this Christmas.

2 / 27
My condolences to Santa for having to fully review the appallingly naughty things you did this year.
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My condolences to Santa for having to fully review the appallingly naughty things you did this year.

3 / 27
Good luck finding something nice to wear to Christmas at Grandma's from your closet of bar hopping slut-gear.
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Good luck finding something nice to wear to Christmas at Grandma's from your closet of bar hopping slut-gear.

4 / 27
Sorry you couldn't have an orgasm because the Elf on the Shelf was watching.
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Sorry you couldn't have an orgasm because the Elf on the Shelf was watching.

5 / 27
It's almost that time of year to not get kissed under mistletoe again.
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It's almost that time of year to not get kissed under mistletoe again.

6 / 27
I'm only wearing this ugly Christmas sweater so that you'll rip it off my body.
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I'm only wearing this ugly Christmas sweater so that you'll rip it off my body.

7 / 27
Thanks for getting me a gift I don't actually have to return.
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Thanks for getting me a gift I don't actually have to return.

8 / 27
The office holiday party is a great place to meet everyone you've been emailing from 10 feet away.
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The office holiday party is a great place to meet everyone you've been emailing from 10 feet away.

9 / 27
Let's not break up until after the holidays.
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Let's not break up until after the holidays.

10 / 27
It must be love since finding you the right holiday gift is causing me debilitating stress.
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It must be love since finding you the right holiday gift is causing me debilitating stress.

11 / 27
You're going to love what I got me for Christmas.
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You're going to love what I got me for Christmas.

12 / 27
I found the perfect gift for someone with money to get you.
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I found the perfect gift for someone with money to get you.

13 / 27
I'm going to regift something special for you.
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I'm going to regift something special for you.

14 / 27
Please don't remotely worry about buying me a gift this year if cash would be easier.
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Please don't remotely worry about buying me a gift this year if cash would be easier.

15 / 27
It's the thought that counts, and I put an awful lot of thought into giving you absolutely nothing.
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It's the thought that counts, and I put an awful lot of thought into giving you absolutely nothing.

16 / 27
May this be the year your significant other gives you a better gift than your Secret Santa does.
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May this be the year your significant other gives you a better gift than your Secret Santa does.

17 / 27
Allow me to apologize in advance for what I'm going to say to you at the office holiday party.
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Allow me to apologize in advance for what I'm going to say to you at the office holiday party.

18 / 27
May you have more sex and fewer unexpected pregnancies than the Virgin Mary this holiday season.
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May you have more sex and fewer unexpected pregnancies than the Virgin Mary this holiday season.

19 / 27
You're obliged to love what I made you.
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You're obliged to love what I made you.

20 / 27
The quality of your Christmas gifts makes me wish Santa was real.
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The quality of your Christmas gifts makes me wish Santa was real.

21 / 27
You'll know I'm your Secret Santa if you don't get anything.
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You'll know I'm your Secret Santa if you don't get anything.

22 / 27
There's nothing like holiday cheer to offset devastating seasonal affective disorder.
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There's nothing like holiday cheer to offset devastating seasonal affective disorder.

23 / 27
Sorry you can't even keep your Christmas tree alive.
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Sorry you can't even keep your Christmas tree alive.

24 / 27
I hope this gift is less disappointing than our relationship.
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I hope this gift is less disappointing than our relationship.

25 / 27
You remind me of Santa in that you work about one day a year and spend the other 364 days judging everyone.
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You remind me of Santa in that you work about one day a year and spend the other 364 days judging everyone.

26 / 27
Even though it doesn't have a limited-time free shipping offer, yours is my favorite package of the holiday season.
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Even though it doesn't have a limited-time free shipping offer, yours is my favorite package of the holiday season.

27 / 27
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