"Men's Rights" Groups Say Feminist Society Oppresses Men

November 5, 2009

We've all heard of women's rights activists, but are you familiar with men's rights activists? MRAs are men who believe that the emancipation of women and the emergence of feminism has led to the oppression of men. (Because, you know, it can't be a win-win proposition!)

Double X provided an extensive exploration of a movement that is trying to appear more mainstream. Here are some MRA claims:

False domestic abuse allegations are rampant.
A feminist-run court system wrongly separates innocent fathers from children.
Battered-women shelters scam taxpayers by transferring federal money to feminists.
Domestic violence laws help mail-order brides fraudulently get green cards.
Men are unrecognized victims of domestic violence themselves.

According to Double X, there's evidence that MRAs have greatly exaggerated many of their concerns about custody and domestic violence. For example, abuse accusations don't automatically win custody for mothers, and often incidents these men count as violence against men are really cases of self-defense. If you think this form of activism sounds too out there to be taken seriously, know that MRAs have had some very real influence. In 2008, they claimed responsibility for helping block the passage of four domestic violence bills.

What do you make of MRAs?

Source: Getty

64 Comments

3 years

thank you Visarg i honestly dont know how anyone reading those issues can still deny men are oppressed just like women are anyone who can honestly disregard the points you make in my opinion is a feminist srry if that offends any non feminists. i would like to add some things that you missed here goes according to the college sports council(CSC) in the sports where the genders compete girls are awarded far more scholarships than boys (20,206-32,656) a 12,000 scholarship difference Boys crisis in school- since about the 90s boys have been outperformed by girls now they represent only 42% of college attendance(a gap that is getting worse) , are more likely to drop out, four times more likely to commit suicide, use drugs, or be diagnosed with ADHD, they have a small advantage in science but every other subject in school they are outperformed by girls especially reading and writing yet despite all of this the gov't only seems concerned with girls education and focus on the small lead boys have in science and have done nothing to help boys especially the significant gap in reading and writing, or attending college. and what about title ix In order for schools to meet the ratio of female to male athletes, administrators have been forced to: 1) eliminate men's teams entirely, and 2) cap the rosters of men's teams. Schools have been forced to intentionally discriminate against male athletes. As a consequence, the average number of male athletes on each NCAA campus has dropped, from a high of 253.54 in 1985 to the low of 199.11 in 2001. oh but i forgot these are mens issues so i guess they dont matter. To all the positive comments being left thank you, but to all of those typical feminist (women are more oppressed) comments i give you all the big middle finger. and if feminism fought for equality why is it that the NOW organization is fighting against shared parenting. Why is the AAUW organization fighting against helping boys in school and trying to debunk the "boy crisis" and why is the WSF and AAUW trying to enforce title's proportionality requirement in the college science and math fields. and i really could go on but why doesnt someone provide me with some examples of these Feminist who are supposedly fighting for "equality" fighting for mens rights issues just give me one example of the NOW or AAUW or WSF actually fighting for mens rights anyone anyone...... again thanks to all of the sensible people out their who know both genders have issues in this country.

lawdawg08 3 years

Ha ha...you love it!!

3 years

lawdog - absolutely no one is going to accuse you of being an attorney. Although I want to extend my personal thanks for your continuing demonstration of juvenile behavior, never mind demonstrating a continuing inability to express clear thought beyond name calling. Everyone is an example of something, so thanks for being a good example of willful, determined ignorance. You're really a natural.

lawdawg08 3 years

...and thanks for pointing out and correcting your typo "dummy"!

lawdawg08 3 years

Ahh..no, Jerk!! Telling someone to take the high road is not offensive.

3 years

Oops. Typo. Should have read: "Your behavior *warrants* the response.

3 years

Nope. You're just going to have to be offended. Your behavior wants the response to your behavior. In fact, you should be the one apologizing.

lawdawg08 3 years

I'm offended and I want you to apologize.

lawdawg08 3 years

I beg your pardon anonymous #42!!

sidra5397 3 years

There are extreme offshoots that will sprout from any movement including feminism BUT just because the extremists who call for female supremacy over males are there does not give this article the right to inaacurately say that "feminist society" is opressive to men. We need to re-examine the definition of feminism because it's getting lost. I'll requote tarynitup because she said it so nicely: Thank you to the MRA's who stated their viewpoints. You sound like fairly reasonable humans. I'm asking you to consider the accuracy of the portrayal of feminists in modern media. Redefining a social movement to marginalize it is one of the oldest tricks in the book. When there is an organized movement against a dominant group, the members of the marginalized group are portrayed as evil, dangerous, irrational and extreme. We have seen this tactic used in the revolutionary war against the founders of this country by the British. We have seen Native Americans, Black Americans, Jews, Union organizers, ecologists and obviously Women be redefined in this way. This redefinition doesn't negate the reality that there are extremists in every movement. However, it takes the emphasis away from needed social change and puts it on how "normal Americans" can defend themselves from the so-called radicals. You've been played MRA's. Some of the changes you'd like to see are valid, but please consider who your foes really are. Most women and feminists are not trying to create a new imbalance with women on top and men on the bottom.

Yogaforlife 3 years

I think men are getting custody more and more. My brother got divorced 2 years ago from his wife - she decided she couldn't be married to an atheist anymore. He got full custody of his daughter, even though she was only 3. There probably are cases where men do not get custody or even shared custody, but at least for my brother, it worked out. I work in a male dominated field (engineering) and I can personally say that I've seen inequality. Some of my male coworkers think that I'm just an overpaid secretary who's to do their filing, get them coffee, and set up appointments. Some have made remarks about me belonging at home with the children and that they'd never let their wife work. I've heard comments like a "woman couldn't possibly be a good engineer", had a client who had only dealt with me over the phone, tell me when we met in person that he just assumed I was a secretary and had no college education. Whenever somebody from the company has to go to an event so that we can show our support, the men assume that it is beneath them and automatically nominate me to go, because they can't waste their time on something so trivial. I'm lucky if I go a week without someone saying something demeaning to my intelligence or ability as a female engineer. I've already been told that I was hired for internships because the company needed to show they had diversity or because the guy interviewing me thought I was hot- um no thanks. Please hire me on my resume and capabilities. As far as the feminist movement has come today - there is still a lot of inequality in the workplace. I can understand the men's grievances on custody and on the fact that yes - they too can be domestic violence victims. But it is possible to acknowledge that custody needs to be shared equally between both parents, and that men suffer from DV, without denying that women still face inequality.

3 years

Lawdog8 is a dog. Did you catch that condescending bark of his? Not only did he talk down to the individual, but for added measure, LECTURED her too. Towit: "...so when you find that new job, [sic] dont treat the men that are working below you the way those jerks are treating you now [sic] becuase it just leads to a very counterproductive work environment." And the condescending dummy didn't even bother with spellcheck. Duh.

3 years

biarose 3 years

I don't know if it has anything to do with "a feminist run court system".. but unfortunately it is the way custody tends to work.

biarose 3 years

Actually, snowysakurasky, my story is far more common than you'd like to believe. The main point of it is, the mother was given primary custody simply because she was the mother, despite the fact that she was living with a convicted felon.

lawdawg08 3 years

Running esq. you should read some of the recent statement released by NOW and modern feminist- they dont want equality or balance, they want supremacy and that is a recipe for disaster. You should have heard or read some of the statments released by NOW during the battle for the Dem. Nomination b/t Hillary and B.O they were very acerbic and counterproductive. Jayde30 im sorry for what you are going through that really sucks. but not all men think and act that way. the men that i work with are very progreesive and would not tolerate anyone being treated they way you are ..so when you find that new job, dont treat the men that are working below you the way those jerks are treating you now becuase it just leads to a very counterproductive work environment.

snowysakurasky 3 years

"this, in my opinion, is why men are so slow to recognize gay rights and women's rights. I think this is the central truth that the MRA misses...What you're missing is how strongly the entire culture denies feminine truth, and how slanted it is towards patriarchal oppression... But I would submit to you that you are blind to the injustice of the world towards women. It's just your nature. Men have fewer emotional colors to paint a situation with. I have been in situations so frequently where the feminine perspective is derided by men, where it's seen as emotional or stupid. The truth is, we are just operating on a different level." interesting perspective and well-put, but as a woman i have never noticed the slant that you speak of, or that men in general have fewer emotional colors to paint a situation with. i think both men and women have varying amounts of emotional colors depending on the person. i'm going to keep my eyes open for the slant but i'm not sold yet. if our culture is so wrongly slanted, what would be the ideal state of american culture, in your opinion? "I absolutely agree with 'A feminist-run court system wrongly separates innocent fathers from children.'..." your story is not typical though, its quite extreme... is it really common that a person who let the kids be abused could keep custody...? please give more details. technically feminists would be for joint custody if they are for equality, no? and im sure mistakes and bad decisions are unfortunately made both ways, but are there any stats to prove that the courts are now run by feminists who favor women at all costs? and the violence against men issue? if its so important to you, do something about it: set up a shelter or support group for these men. write a self help book for them, there are already equal laws for men and women to protect people from violence, what more can we do if they, as adults (including women) don't want to seek help or tell anyone.

snowysakurasky 3 years

"Every time I see or hear a story of a feminist or feminist organisation, it's always about denouncing men and empowering women. I'm tired of being marginalised. I'm a strong, honest, hard-working male. I don't beat women, I won't stand for male misogyny, and I believe in true equality. Yet feminists tell me that I'm privileged; that they deserve some of what I have, despite my hard work and dedication." if you are really working harder, smarter, and more efficiently than another person who has the same job as you, i don't mind you getting paid more. in fact you should be. however if two people have the same seniority, efficiency, and position and the male is paid more, than the male is privileged, no? last i heard this was still an issue.

snowysakurasky 3 years

""I KNOW THAT NOT ALL FEMINISTS ARE ANGRY MISOGYNISTS. But no one can deny that this archetype has begun to appear more commonly as the mainstay of what a feminist engenders."" really, your typo (you don't mean misogynist, right?) aside, i really didn't notice that. where are these radical feminists who are becoming more and more common? i don't see or hear of them doing anything. if i have to look for info on some obscure website or something, i don't think you can claim that 'noone can deny they are becoming more and more common'

snowysakurasky 3 years

"Why are so many commercials and advertisements based on gender roles in which women run the households and men don't have a clue how to cook dinner or use a laundry machine? " believe me, men like that do exist!

3 years

Mermei: Thanks for pointing that out. I often use the term "female misogyny" because so few people have even heard the term misandry. It wasn't even a listed word in my firefox spell-check. Spacekatgal: When you open with a line like "there is a quality of men that is oblivious to anything outside of their own perspective", do you see how we can feel marginalised? Like you're talking down to us? You boxed all men into a singular group [as though we're all exactly the same], and then insulted us. I know that wasn't your intention, but can you imagine how you'd feel if I replied in kind? "There is a quality of women that is oblivious to anything of importance; they are full of emotional whimsy". I wouldn't disrespect you in such a way, and I expect a similar treatment. You go on to equate the women's rights movement with the gay rights movement. The two are nothing alike; and it can be shown time and again that the primary opponents of gay rights are the religious groups, who are comprised of both females and males. You also state "feminine truth" as though it's an empirical truth. It's not. Feminst theory is a collection of philosophical and social ideals that have no centralised authority. Feminists are free to pick and choose which "truth" they believe; leaving them open to use the no true Scotsman fallacy as often as they'd like. Your post is designed to marginalise me; "it's just your nature". It's offensive, and yet I can't bring myself to blame you for using such rationale. It's been indoctrinated into society. Us males are all just buffoons, incapable of rational discussion. Following from that, I respect the feminist position, insofar as it attempts equality. There is a hole in popular feminist ideology, though. It isn't seeking equality, but positive parity [for women only]. That is, it fights for women to achieve the same level of pay, but it doesn't fight for women to have to achieve the same level of skill, experience, and dedication in order to achieve that level of pay. An illustration of this is an article I read recently regarding affirmative action: http://www.insidehighered.com/news/2009/11/02/admit. Certain US colleges are practising affirmative action in order to balance the ratio of males and females attending. These affirmative action laws were originally crafted and lobbied by feminist groups in order to ensure more women attend college. Now that more women are attending, and these laws are being used to the detriment of women, we see a huge public outcry by feminists: http://www.nytimes.com/2006/03/23/opinion/23britz.html?_r=2. This can't be interpreted as anything other than blatant hypocrisy and sexism; yet this is what we see on a regular basis.

mermei 3 years

I dunno, SpaceKat, I suspect that the fact that sexism against women still exists is not a good enough reason to allow men to be treated unfairly. And while I agree that differences between men and women exist, the idea that these poor, emotionally stunted men just can't understand the female experience sounds really (almost ironically) patronizing.

leslievanhouten 3 years

great post taryn. There's definitely a lot of overlap between the feminist movement and MRAs. Many feminists are normal people who want equality, not man hating feminazis. I will say, that it's not feminists or women in general who do not recognize female on male domestic abuse or even abuse in general, it's men. If a man admits that he was assaulted by a woman, who's going to laugh at him. Likely, it's not going to be a female. I've been following a story about a Yelp reviewer who posted a negative review of a bookstore in SF. The owner, a female, wrote half a dozen bizarre, aggressive, mentally unhinged messages to this guy. Then tracked him down, showed up at his house and attacked him. When the reviewer posted about his experience on Yelp, a lot of the men were making fun of him for getting assaulted by woman. Moral of the story: know your enemy. It's not always "feminists", sometimes (often) it's other men.

runningesq 3 years

Beautifully put, Spacekat (as per usual!). As to the men as victims: how does feminism downplay this? From my own PERSONAL experience, men are less likely to come forward as victims for fear of ridicule. This is sad and needs to be adressed, but it is not the fault of feminism or women who fight for equal rights. Most (all?) feminists I know are for the safety of ALL people in relationships.

tarynitup 3 years

Thank you to the MRA's who stated their viewpoints. You sound like fairly reasonable humans. I'm asking you to consider the accuracy of the portrayal of feminists in modern media. Redefining a social movement to marginalize it is one of the oldest tricks in the book. When there is an organized movement against a dominant group, the members of the marginalized group are portrayed as evil, dangerous, irrational and extreme. We have seen this tactic used in the revolutionary war against the founders of this country by the British. We have seen Native Americans, Black Americans, Jews, Union organizers, ecologists and obviously Women be redefined in this way. This redefinition doesn't negate the reality that there are extremists in every movement. However, it takes the emphasis away from needed social change and puts it on how "normal Americans" can defend themselves from the so-called radicals. You've been played MRA's. Some of the changes you'd like to see are valid, but please consider who your foes really are. Most women and feminists are not trying to create a new imbalance with women on top and men on the bottom. While your considering the reality of the feminist movement, I will consider the reality of the MR movement. peace, love, and soul to you all!!!

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64 Comments