5 Kinky Ways to Surprise Him

5 Kinky Ways to Surprise Him

Updated 09/11/11 3:32 PM · Posted by Guest Writer · 28 comments

Love and Sex · Books · Lists · community · culture · Book Bag · Kinky Sex · A Little Bit Kinky · Natasha Janina Valdez · kinky surprises

We're excited to welcome clinical sexologist and author of A Little Bit Kinky Dr. Natasha Janina Valdez for a week of guest blogging.

Whether it’s for a specific occasion, or for no reason at all, if you want to surprise your man and up the kink level in your sex life then try these:

  1. Set your phone alarm for an early wake up call and when it rings tell him it's time for his morning blow job!
  2. Offer to clean his car naked. And then do it. In the garage of course.
  3. Blind fold him and stimulate him with a bullet vibrator.
  4. Hire a stripper to dance for the both of you and when you start to get turned on or jealous have her take off and now get it on with your guy!
  5. On your next date wear a little black dress and no underwear. Carry your sexiest pair of panties with you and for dessert, hand them to him!

Dr. Natasha Janina Valdez is one of the nation’s leading sex experts and a certified clinical sexologist with a doctorate in human sexuality. Her new book A Little Bit Kinky is an imaginative and open-minded guide to exploring new possibilities in the bedroom and healthier relationships. Visit her online at drnatasha.com.

28 Comments - Post a Comment

Anonymous - 2 years ago Report Comment
STFU
- 2 years ago Report Comment
Really? #4 is especially disgusting to me... to each his/her own, though I guess....
Anonymous - 2 years ago Report Comment
These are horrible suggestions especially #4. Just because someone is hired to take their clothes off doesn't mean they're required to have sex. Ever think that the stripper you hired, who is a human being with her own emotions and reasons for doing the job she does, may not want to have sex with your partner nor should she be required to? Not to mention the fact that paying women for stripping/sex fuels sexual objectification of women and violence against women.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
I couldn't help but laugh. I might as well get tips off Cosmopolitan.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
I don't think they meant for the stripper to have sex with your man... but it's still pretty gross to me.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
I think #5 is fun. I've whispered in his ear that I didn't have any underwear on before, but I have not thought to hand him underwear- hilarity!
Anonymous - 2 years ago Report Comment
Oh, ok, I misread it. However, I still don't understand how hiring a stripper will spice things up and as mentioned before I definitely have a problem with hiring strippers in general.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
I laughed too... why the f would you hire a stripper if it's going to make you jealous? Anyway, these posts have convinced me that this book is not worth picking up.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
#4 definitely did not mean for her to screw your guy... I just don't see the point in having her come to your house. Why not go to the strip club? Clean his car naked? I actually laughed when I read that one... how ridiculous. Dr Natasha, do you follow your own advice? Or are you trying to make fools out of us? #5 is good, but honestly, the more Dr Natasha suggestions I read, the LESS I want to ever read this book.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
Pistil, we must have been typing at he same time... I'm glad I'm not the only one who DOESN'T want this book. Anon #7 if you want a threesome but are afraid of the effect it will have on your relationship, strippers give your the fantasy without the jealousy. I think, though, that Dr Natasha is encouraging the fantasy of fighting for your man... how ridiculous.
Anonymous - 2 years ago Report Comment
hmm....not so sure about these...
- 2 years ago Report Comment
#3...Ummmm....that might not be a welcome surprise.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
What is a bullet vibrator? My man actually respects me and doesn't want me to act like a ho, washing the car naked Jessica Simpson-style? Hell no! Blow jobs in the morning? Eww! He'd never tell you I'm a prude, but I know how to be kinky without being a ridiculous mess!
- 2 years ago Report Comment
i don't give a girl any pleasure in the morning either Starbucks...oral on a "ripped tennis ball" before she showers EWWWW! So i suppose i'm a sophisticated Man? better then the rest, i'm not a "skank" either right?? Or maybe the whole fact that you think normal activity in the morning is "Ho"-ish IS the sexist problem in this country? prude.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
some of these are so odd! Clean the car naked? I'd think that would be low on the list for most guys.
Dr. Natasha - 2 years ago Report Comment
Where's your sense of humor and adventure? And yes, I've done them all. I never really cleaned the car, I just started too and when my guy saw me he swooped me up and well, you know the rest. As for the stripper suggestion. I hired a friend of mine who's a stripper and this was her idea. We tried it and it worked amazingly. And I never suggested you have sex with her. Don't knock it until you've tried it...or better yet, ask your guy what he thinks about it.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
# 4 is ridiculous. I will never understand why anyone (especially a sexologist) would tell a woman to do things that will make her jealous/uncomfortable. No one is telling men to hire sexy guys to help turn on their gfs.
Anonymous - 2 years ago Report Comment
got to agree with dr. natasha on this. ladies, you really do need to lighten up. you don't want to hire some woman to dance on your man, i can give you that (although if you trust your guy, what's the problem? is it your own insecurity that won't let you even consider this daring idea?) but if the thought of giving your boyfriend a blowjob in the morning is disgusting to you, i just feel bad for your man and your lame sex life. sometimes it's fun to do silly things and ham it up for your man too, washing a car naked (i would also suggest a killer pair of high heels to go with it) would be so fun, if only i had a garage! sorry ladies, but men generally like all these things and a little experimentation to boot. if you want him to brag about what an awesome girlfriend you are, try having a more open mind.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
Doc (#16)...you hired a friend to dance for your bf? WEIRD! Guess you just weren't enough to keep him satisfied!
- 2 years ago Report Comment
Wait, WASHING a car or CLEANING a car? HUGE difference... In my part area, CLEANING your car means getting the hose attachments and sweeping under the seats... not sexy. Sorry if I misunderstood that one... a naked car wash with heels would be hot for him. Guys are simply like that. They like shiny cars and wet flesh. Do you have a chance to go back and edit this book before it's published? Just to change that whole 'clean the car' part? My thing with the stripper is, why pay $300+ for her to come to your house, when you could pay less than $80 for his admission, drinks, tips, dances and atmosphere. From what I understand, a chick earns about $250 plus $20 per lap dance to come to a bachelor party. I'm talking common sense economics here. You also get to pick your chick out TOGETHER... and you can get dances from bunches of different girls. Not if it makes you jealous though, just if it turns you on. You risk screwing up your relationship if you make yourself jealous.
Anonymous - 2 years ago Report Comment
so lame!
- 2 years ago Report Comment
Oh no Dr., for the record I think 1 3 and 5 are hot (though I wouldn't take damned panties with me :P). I just think the car washing gig is so contrived I'd just burst out laughing if I ever tried it. He probably would too. The stripper thing is just a huge WTF but every couple is different I guess. But I don't really get how blow jobs in the morning are more or less "disgusting" than any old blow job? starbucks: bullet vibrators are designed for guys (though not exclusive to ;)). It's basically a uh c--k ring with a vibrating bullet attached. yep. ;p
- 2 years ago Report Comment
I think a blow job in the morning is fine, but Natasha, you really might consider rewriting/rewording some of these... because setting an alarm and announcing it makes you sound like a drill sargent, or like it's a chore or something.
- 2 years ago Report Comment
And with the stripper, it's the 'until you get jealous' part that gets to me. Still, this is nothing I haven't read in Cosmo, and everyone knows Cosmo is the epitome of sex.
Anonymous - 2 years ago Report Comment
If only my guy had a car.... and a garage... and didnt live with his parents... ...that would be so damn hot. Though he would probably be like "wtf are you doing..."
Anonymous - 2 years ago Report Comment
Pay attention ladies. The guys all basically agree that the more adventurous you are in bed and the home the better. Most guys do like the sophisticated appearance in public, but when alone, the more risque the better. Guys love this kind of stuff in general.
Anonymous - 1 year ago Report Comment
Hahahaha, Natasha no longer works here!
- 4 months ago Report Comment
Setting the alarm for a bj ? I'd rather sleep ...... the car cleaning thing? - my husband would make sure I finished cleaning it first !! LOL How about this? Wear some heels and an apron (and nothing else) while making breakfast........

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